I'm dying.....

DivotMaker · Post by **DivotMaker** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 1:27 pm

GROGtheNailer wrote:I've had to sh1t since 10 am this morning and it's now 3 pm, I just cannot have a poop at work, it's a phobia really, cant go in a public bathroom. I have to last another hour and a half.......the pain is quite interesting right now.

Finch?

dbdynsty25 · Post by **dbdynsty25** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 1:29 pm

Spooky wrote:I absolutely refuse to sh*t at work as well. Unless it is impossible for me to control it, I will not go here at work. I have actually trained my biological clock to not have to go until about 4-6pm.

That is hillarious...I have done the exact same thing. I just can't crap at work either. It also helps that I only live 10 min. away so I can just go home and grow a tail whenever I need to.

TheTruth · Post by **TheTruth** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 1:37 pm

Spooky wrote:Wow...I CANNOT believe I am posting in this thread (let alone reading it), but here it goes...

I absolutely refuse to sh*t at work as well. Unless it is impossible for me to control it, I will not go here at work. I have actually trained my biological clock to not have to go until about 4-6pm.

I agree spook, about posting in this thread and training your bowels....unless I just ate Mexican (or something) and it went straight through me, I will not use the office toilet. My bowels are trained to go either at lunch, after work, or before work.

Brando70 · Post by **Brando70** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 2:13 pm

Do you guys all work at gas stations or something? Seriously, how bad can they be?

Post by **ScoopBrady** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 2:16 pm

Grog, please tell me you've gone since making this thread.

Leebo33 · Post by **Leebo33** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 2:53 pm

Brando70 wrote:Do you guys all work at gas stations or something? Seriously, how bad can they be?

LOL.

I'm the opposite of those guys. I try to only sh*t at the office on work days. Why should I sh*t on my time? That way I can literally get paid to do sh*t.

GROGtheNailer · Post by **GROGtheNailer** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 3:01 pm

You see, there are many of us out there, the few...the proud....the PWCPIP (if you know what that stands for...you are one of us)

Brando70 · Post by **Brando70** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 3:32 pm

Leebo33 wrote:
Brando70 wrote:Do you guys all work at gas stations or something? Seriously, how bad can they be?
LOL.

I'm the opposite of those guys. I try to only sh*t at the office on work days. Why should I sh*t on my time? That way I can literally get paid to do sh*t.

I kept envisioning The Worst Toilet in Scotland. And I agree, I need my "breaks" to get through the day.

webdanzer · Post by **webdanzer** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 3:36 pm

Whew! Thank God for excrement, eh boys? Nothing like a s*** thread to set this forum back on it's normal, even keel.

Without s***, several blogs I'm aware of would likely be out of commission as well.

Urm. More out of commission.

jimd · Post by **jimd** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 3:42 pm

I spent 3 years of my life living in a house with a bathroom with no door and usually no TP, and shared by 8 fellow rugby players. As a result, I usually timed my craps for when I would be out of the house.

My advice?

Stop being a p***y, suck it up, and take a crap at work.

Jimmydeicide · Post by **Jimmydeicide** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 6:08 pm

"Touching cloth" eh Grog.

Someone send Grog a new game, he needs to occupy his time some other way.

Teal · Post by **Teal** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 6:23 pm

I'll open the door for Mr. Hanky anytime he comes knockin'...

Hiiiiiiideee Ho!

F308GTB · Post by **F308GTB** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 8:37 pm

I've trained myself to not purge poop in public places, except work (doesn't count as public since it's an office - I do coat that seat with TP though). I've only broken that once in the last 2 decades. Even going halfway around the world I squeeze them cheeks. Ain't no way I'm taking a dump on the plane. I can hit it 3-6 times a day here at home/work, but I can go nearly 24 hours backed up if needed when I travel.

Hell, I'm afraid of some of the stuff I might pick up when I piss in some restrooms. We boys can be pretty damn disgusting. I tell my wife about the piss on the floor and she just, well, shits.

Teal · Post by **Teal** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 8:56 pm

I went hiking and camping a few weeks ago with a good friend of mine, out into the middle of nowhere. We packed TP and a camp shovel, but never used it, either one of us. Whether it was a subconscious effort to put off giving birth to the little brown baby, or just not needing to, I don't know. What I do know is that the moment we got back to civilization, I had tremendous pressure brought to bear on the ol' sphinxter, and had to find a suitable turd bank in which to make a significant deposit, and...

My lord, I just realized that I've posted TWICE in here...

GROGtheNailer · Post by **GROGtheNailer** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 11:18 pm

It's freedom to talk about it...let's hear more....it's soothing...you want to talk bout it...to let go....to just be.

Diablo25 · Post by **Diablo25** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 11:22 pm

I got no problem pulling up for a "J" at work...none whatsoever. When the time comes - I hit the chicken switch.

pk500 · Post by **pk500** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 11:26 pm

I can and will sh*t any time, any place. If the urge strikes, then the turd flaps are opening for the big brown bomb.

In fact, when I was a competitive distance runner in high school and college, I often sh*t in the woods at the roadside if the urge struck, using leaves to clean up. One time in college on a training run, I was in a hurry to finish the roadside duty because the boys were getting pretty far ahead of me, so I just reached back for any old leaf.

It was poison ivy. Within three days, I had poison ivy all over my body, radiating from my puckerhole.

I sh*t you not, no pun intended.

Take care,
PK

Teal · Post by **Teal** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 11:26 pm

GROGtheNailer wrote:It's freedom to talk about it...let's hear more....it's soothing...you want to talk bout it...to let go....to just be.

You're one unique dude, grog...I gotta give you that. It's like a fetish, isn't it?

Teal · Post by **Teal** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 11:29 pm

pk500 wrote:One time in college on a training run, I was in a hurry to finish the roadside duty because the boys were getting pretty far ahead of me, so I just reached back for any old leaf.

It was poison ivy. Within three days, I had poison ivy all over my body, radiating from my puckerhole.

I sh*t you not, no pun intended.

Take care,
PK

I bet you had stinky finger for a few days...

Teal · Post by **Teal** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 11:33 pm

pk500 wrote:the turd flaps are opening for the big brown bomb.

I've found a way to keep the thread going, for the sake of Grog. We've all apparently found interesting euphamisms to describe the big dumparuski. Let's hear em all. I'll resurrect one of mine from earlier:

"Giving birth to the little brown baby"

C'mon, let's make it a party!

Teal · Post by **Teal** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 11:34 pm

"Letting the starfish puke"

Jayhawker · Post by **Jayhawker** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 11:40 pm

Illinois is up by one point at the half. Are their fans crappin' in their pants, or will they use the facilities at the RCA Dome?

pk500 · Post by **pk500** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 11:42 pm

"Leaving a few friends at the pool"

"Pinching a loaf"

Take care,
PK

Teal · Post by **Teal** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 11:42 pm

Jayhawker wrote:Illinois is up by one point at the half. Are their fans crappin' in their pants, or will they use the facilities at the RCA Dome?

I dunno...hey Grog! You an Illini fan?

Teal · Post by **Teal** » Thu Mar 17, 2005 11:44 pm

pk500 wrote:"Leaving a few friends at the pool"

"Pinching a loaf"

Take care,
PK

Yeah, there we go!

"Droppin' the rocks"

"Growin' a tail"

Digital Sportspage

I'm dying.....

Re: I'm dying.....