Soccer thread 09/10 (contains spoilers)

Naples39 · Post by **Naples39** » Mon Feb 01, 2010 7:11 pm

davet010 wrote:Sorry for the rant, but next to Baconface, Redknapp is someone for whom I feel only the utmost contempt.

Actually this rant was less over-the-top than expected. I put on my daveT flame repellent suit every time I post on this board about spurs.

davet010 · Post by **davet010** » Tue Feb 02, 2010 4:33 am

Naples39 wrote:
davet010 wrote:Sorry for the rant, but next to Baconface, Redknapp is someone for whom I feel only the utmost contempt.
Actually this rant was less over-the-top than expected. I put on my daveT flame repellent suit every time I post on this board about spurs.

Right then, now that I've cleared my throat, let us begin......

fsquid · Post by **fsquid** » Tue Feb 02, 2010 1:55 pm

I'm just glad DaveT does not hate the Wednesday. I've been spared over the last 5-6 years.

Feanor · Post by **Feanor** » Tue Feb 02, 2010 2:24 pm

I can't stand the commentator from yesterday's match, Jon Champion. He's so smug and snarky about everything.

Hated him in PES 2009, too.

Macca00 · Post by **Macca00** » Tue Feb 02, 2010 4:19 pm

fsquid wrote:I'm just glad DaveT does not hate the Wednesday. I've been spared over the last 5-6 years.

I don't think you understand, Dave hates everything it's just different degrees of hate. Fortunately, Wednesday are far down on the list behind Liverpool, Spurs, Nazis and Man U.

JRod · Post by **JRod** » Tue Feb 02, 2010 4:58 pm

Macca00 wrote:
fsquid wrote:I'm just glad DaveT does not hate the Wednesday. I've been spared over the last 5-6 years.
I don't think you understand, Dave hates everything it's just different degrees of hate. Fortunately, Wednesday are far down on the list behind Liverpool, Spurs, Nazis and Man U.

Haha!

davet010 · Post by **davet010** » Wed Feb 03, 2010 4:38 am

Macca00 wrote:
fsquid wrote:I'm just glad DaveT does not hate the Wednesday. I've been spared over the last 5-6 years.
I don't think you understand, Dave hates everything it's just different degrees of hate. Fortunately, Wednesday are far down on the list behind Liverpool, Spurs, Nazis and Man U.

Ahem !

I only really despise hypocrites, cheats, thieves and arseholes, so that really only encompasses Chelsea, ManUre, and Nazis in the football sphere.

Everyone else drifts around in a world of blissful indifference, until one of those tags starts to attach to them. So, for example, I am relatively indifferent about Spurs, until a thieving, cheating, arsehole attaches himself to them, in which case they attract my dislike.

Sitting outside this, however, are my personal dislikes which have an overspill into football. As a Mancunian, I am genetically predisposed to practicality, sarcasm and hating Scousers. Thus although I am not particularly roused to ire by Liverpool FC (and would urge them on in European competitions, by and large), the sight of so many Scousers together in a crowd makes me nauseous. As for EVerton, their fans are racist, knuckle-dragging buffoons and their manager is a self-pitying bullshitter who has achieved nothing - so tuff luck, Toffees.

Hope that has clarified matters for you all

Yes, I know, I am only channelling the great one

davet010 · Post by **davet010** » Wed Feb 03, 2010 4:40 am

Macca00 wrote:
fsquid wrote:I'm just glad DaveT does not hate the Wednesday. I've been spared over the last 5-6 years.
I don't think you understand, Dave hates everything it's just different degrees of hate. Fortunately, Wednesday are far down on the list behind Liverpool, Spurs, Nazis and Man U.

Ahem !

I only really despise hypocrites, cheats, thieves and arseholes, so that really only encompasses Chelsea, ManUre, and Nazis in the football sphere.

Everyone else drifts around in a world of blissful indifference, until one of those tags starts to attach to them. So, for example, I am relatively indifferent about Spurs, until a thieving, cheating, arsehole attaches himself to them, in which case they attract my dislike.

Sitting outside this, however, are my personal dislikes which have an overspill into football. As a Mancunian, I am genetically predisposed to practicality, sarcasm and hating Scousers. Thus although I am not particularly roused to ire by Liverpool FC (and would urge them on in European competitions, by and large), the sight of so many Scousers together in a crowd makes me nauseous. As for EVerton, their fans are racist, knuckle-dragging buffoons and their manager is a self-pitying bullshitter who has achieved nothing - so tuff luck, Toffees.

Hope that has clarified matters for you all

Yes, I know, I am only channelling the great Bill....just think of me as what he'd have been like had he done a football podcast.

Macca00 · Post by **Macca00** » Wed Feb 03, 2010 10:39 am

Correction: He doesn't hate double posts.

davet010 · Post by **davet010** » Wed Feb 03, 2010 11:12 am

Must be the first time I've done that, so far as I remember. I think it was because I was trying to include a picture of Saint Bill and was having difficulties with it.

Macca00 · Post by **Macca00** » Wed Feb 03, 2010 11:18 am

I'm just messin' with ya, Dave.

Feanor · Post by **Feanor** » Wed Feb 03, 2010 4:36 pm

DeMarcus Beasley's car got blown up outside his home in Scotloland:

http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2010 ... r-blown-up

miget33 · Post by **miget33** » Wed Feb 03, 2010 6:20 pm

So the reason the US team in France '98 sucked, was because Harkes was banging Wynalda's wife.

http://msn.foxsports.com/foxsoccer/worl ... occer-team

fsquid · Post by **fsquid** » Wed Feb 03, 2010 10:09 pm

miget33 wrote:So the reason the US team in France '98 sucked, was because Harkes was banging Wynalda's wife.

http://msn.foxsports.com/foxsoccer/worl ... occer-team

Should have chosen the Wednesday LEGEND over the blowhard.

davet010 · Post by **davet010** » Thu Feb 04, 2010 4:22 am

John Terry....the hits keep coming.

If the slab-faced chav thinks he's rode through the storm, then I hope he's ready for this weekend's tabloid revelations...

1. The Sun have lined up another EIGHT women whove slept with him in the last 18 months or so. Enough for a couple of weeks of front pages. Including FHMs own HSH, Tanya Robinson
2. The front page today that Bridges ex, Vanessa, has slept with five members of the Chelsea squad is only the beginning. Two other Chelsea players - Gudjonsen and Drogba - were also sleeping with Bridge's girlfriend at the same time as Terry.
3. The Sun is also paying Vanessa £250k to dish everything including the fact that the mystery fifth Chelsea player is, depressingly predictably, Ashley Cole. Which should give Cheryl the excuse she needs to finally dump him (now shes no longer Racist Toilet Cleaner Puncher, but the new Nations Sweetheart)
4. JT has also been sleeping with current team mate Hilario's wife (who also has kids).
5. Away from the bedroom, JT also owes Wembley a substantial amount of money for a box he owns and hasn't paid for, even after he had mates in there racking up a £20k bill at the FA Cup final

What a star.

In other news, Twitcher Redknapp has declared that Jermaine Defoe derseves a place at the WC after his hat-trick last night against Leeds.

Sure think Harry, we'll just have to weigh that hat-trick against a third division opponent against Micheal Owen's hat-trick against Champiosnhip opposition earlier in the season, apply the FIFA coefficient and decide which of them should have the 24th slot in the squad, which entails changing the iPod, making the tea and coming on for the last 10 minutes to run around and achieve nothing.

wco81 · Post by **wco81** » Thu Feb 04, 2010 4:44 am

English fans seem to think the only chance they can win the WC is with Terry.

So he skates?

That woman is a prize. Or maybe Bridge pissed her off and she got her revenge.

Tiger Woods is a punter compared to Terry.

10spro · Post by **10spro** » Thu Feb 04, 2010 4:50 am

Capello has some decisons to make. Strip him of his captaincy?

davet010 · Post by **davet010** » Thu Feb 04, 2010 8:04 am

As most of you know, the British tabloid press live in an alternate reality where sportsmen are our greatest representatives, people give a s*** what supermodels think or care about whether soap stars go on holiday or not.

They have only one mantra 'Do As I Say Not Do As I Do', and their only interest is in the sale of newspapers and not in the provision of actually researched 'news', on the basis that most people read their rags on the train or on the bog, as opposed to actually taking notice of them.

This is the world in which every child under 16 looks up to the England captain and takes their activities as a model by which to live. This is the world in which England might win the WC (or in which Michael Owen was the best signing of the Summer and will be in Capello's thoughts all the time).

The more I think about it, the more I realise that it is actually I who inhabit a reality where no one could care less about these things, and where the only thing that should happen is that Wayne Bridge should kick the s*** out of Terry next time City play Chelsea...or else point Nigel de Jong and Craig Bellamy at him and utter the command 'kill'.

In summary, I couldn't give two hoots whether Capello takes the armband off him or not. So long as it doesn't affect City, I couldn't care less, as the moral side of it does not add anything to our knowledge...everyone has always known that Cashley Cole was a criminal waste of carbon, for example.

One final point - Gudjohnsson, mentioned as also having dipped his wick in her, is now at Tottenham after another piece of Redknapp crooked business. They play at Eastlands soon. If I was him, I wouldn't be wearing shinpads, but I'd have the Yellow Pages down me socks.

Naples39 · Post by **Naples39** » Thu Feb 04, 2010 10:11 am

At what point does a guy stop being mad at his mates and simply conclude that his ex was a total whore?

I mean it sounds like this chick was the team cum dumpster and Bridge was the sap who made her his girlfriend while everyone else in the room snickered.

davet010 · Post by **davet010** » Thu Feb 04, 2010 11:28 am

Naples39 wrote:At what point does a guy stop being mad at his mates and simply conclude that his ex was a total whore?

I mean it sounds like this chick was the team cum dumpster and Bridge was the sap who made her his girlfriend while everyone else in the room snickered.

I think that was obviously a while ago, but Bridge and this lass had a kid who is about 18 months old or so. I also suspect that he didn't know that she had more blokes dribbling round her than the training cones - particularly as he knew that Terry was taking birds round to his house and banging them,

It is fair to say that she doesn't exactly sound like a charmer...and will do so even less if she takes the Sun's money and dishes the full tale. Bridge is, of course, going to get pure grief at every ground he plays at for quite a while.

Macca00 · Post by **Macca00** » Thu Feb 04, 2010 1:25 pm

+10 to Naples for using the term 'cum dumpster'

Dave,
Just so I can lay to rest any concerns about Liverpool's captain, is there any info on whether or not Bridge's girlfriend likes/dislikes Phil Collins?

Feanor · Post by **Feanor** » Thu Feb 04, 2010 2:05 pm

I'm not familiar with that term; I better google it.

Naples39 · Post by **Naples39** » Thu Feb 04, 2010 2:16 pm

Feanor wrote:I'm not familiar with that term; I better google it.

I've always found the terms to be quite evocative. I'm sure you can figure it out.

Macca00 · Post by **Macca00** » Thu Feb 04, 2010 2:16 pm

Turn safe search off (unless the kids are around).

Naples39 · Post by **Naples39** » Thu Feb 04, 2010 2:23 pm

urbandictionary.com

Frankly I'd be a little terrified of what comes up just putting that term into google.