The week of DSP threadjacks

Brando70 · Post by **Brando70** » Thu Mar 31, 2005 6:30 pm

I know we have a tendency to diverge into tangents here, but I can't recall when more threads spun into completely random directions: race relations, tort reform, gratitous use of the word anus.

So I offer a humble bit of amusement -- the typical DSP threadjack.

Subject: I like bananas

--I really enjoy bananas. I find the yellow color pleasing and they are sweet and filling.

--I think it's funny when people slip on bananas.

--Hey, you insensitive prick, my grandma slipped on a banana once and had to spend three weeks in the hospital. What's worse, her insurance didn't cover it.

--[robotic voice]HMOs are the tool of Republican subversion. Soon we will be forced to use leeches and duct tape because insurance companies are gouging the prolitariat for profits. Beep!

--No, the reason people can't afford medicine is because of asshole lawyers. There was this guy who choked on a banana, then sued the banana company and won a whole bunch of money. We need some serious tort reform.

--If the banana companies wouldn't make the bananas so big, or the peels so slippery, none of this would happen. There should be government regulation of banana girth and peel friction.

--Did you hear that Chiquita bought all the rights to distribute bananas in the US for the next five years? This sux! They're just scared of Dole and their advances in banana harvesting. So f*** Chiquita, I'm starting a boycott.

--Bananas are not too big. The problem is people take bites that are way too big for their mouths. Where is the personal responsibility for these brain-dead morons?

--You know, I am brain-dead, but I don't like being called a moron. Wait, it's the other way around.

--Bananas are so American. In Europe, where civilization actually exists, people eat melon. All the guys in Radiohead eat melon too. That's why the Big East will rule the universe.

--I just got my new Portable Banana Bunch (PBB). It's amazing -- they've crammed an entire bunch of bananas into the size of one!

--Yeah, but the peeling times suck. It takes 30 seconds just to peel one PBB banana. Screw that, I'm sticking to bananas on my PC.

--Speaking of bananas, I can't hit in MVP.

Inuyasha · Post by **Inuyasha** » Thu Mar 31, 2005 6:32 pm

Pope given last rites....

Post by **ScoopBrady** » Thu Mar 31, 2005 6:36 pm

Why the f#$k don't you like oranges you heartless pr!ck!

Leebo33 · Post by **Leebo33** » Thu Mar 31, 2005 8:18 pm

Did someone say threadrack?

Jimmydeicide · Post by **Jimmydeicide** » Thu Mar 31, 2005 8:38 pm

Bannanas are the same shape as Grogs pooh when he finaly goes.

http://www.digitalsportspage.com/module ... pic&t=4162

Jackdog · Post by **Jackdog** » Thu Mar 31, 2005 8:42 pm

I am so guilty.

Spooky · Post by **Spooky** » Fri Apr 01, 2005 12:04 pm

So what poor DSP soul will be the first to post a lame April Fool's joke thread today???

rubba19 · Post by **rubba19** » Fri Apr 01, 2005 4:08 pm

The Banana Bowl is my favorite bowl game.....pits #6 MAC vs. #7 Big West...can't wait for next years game.

Leebo33 · Post by **Leebo33** » Fri Apr 01, 2005 4:18 pm

If I haven't seen their picture, if applicable, I will associate people with their avatars. DB looks like a cross between Amare Stoudemire and Andruw Jones. Right now, Brando in my mind's eye reminds me of Bill Murray. Mobiggins will always look like Einstein. Kazuya is a hot chick. I wonder if people think I look like Honus Wagner?

spooky157 · Post by **spooky157** » Fri Apr 01, 2005 4:23 pm

Leebo33 wrote:If I haven't seen their picture, if applicable, I will associate people with their avatars. DB looks like a cross between Amare Stoudemire and Andruw Jones. Right now, Brando in my mind's eye reminds me of Bill Murray. Mobiggins will always look like Einstein. Kazuya is a hot chick. I wonder if people think I look like Honus Wagner?

Yeah, Kaz is so f*cking hot. I wanna beat off in his face......but he has to pay attention to Betsy.

Leebo33 · Post by **Leebo33** » Fri Apr 01, 2005 4:33 pm

If you could find who the girls were in high school/college that you could have slept with, but didn't, would you want to know? I don't think I'd want to know. Either I'd be pissed off that the list was so short or ...well, I'd probably be pissed off that the list was so short.

sportdan30 · Post by **sportdan30** » Fri Apr 01, 2005 4:39 pm

Spooky wrote:So what poor DSP soul will be the first to post a lame April Fool's joke thread today???

I do believe I posted one last year. I have learned. Quite shameful to say the least.

HipE · Post by **HipE** » Fri Apr 01, 2005 4:57 pm

Leebo33 wrote:If I haven't seen their picture, if applicable, I will associate people with their avatars. DB looks like a cross between Amare Stoudemire and Andruw Jones. Right now, Brando in my mind's eye reminds me of Bill Murray. Mobiggins will always look like Einstein. Kazuya is a hot chick. I wonder if people think I look like Honus Wagner?

Do you picture me as a red x?

tsunami · Post by **tsunami** » Fri Apr 01, 2005 5:32 pm

Leebo33 wrote:If I haven't seen their picture, if applicable, I will associate people with their avatars. DB looks like a cross between Amare Stoudemire and Andruw Jones. Right now, Brando in my mind's eye reminds me of Bill Murray. Mobiggins will always look like Einstein. Kazuya is a hot chick. I wonder if people think I look like Honus Wagner?

That's funny...because I sometimes find myself picturing the person as somehow appearing like their avatar picture (when it's a person), especially if they have had it for a long time. I know there is someone here who has an Andy Reid picture (sorry...can't remember right now) and I always think "Hey, Andy Reid has something tp say!". Same goes for Kaz's Tera picture, although I don't assume he looks that good.

spooky157 · Post by **spooky157** » Fri Apr 01, 2005 5:40 pm

Leebo33 wrote:If you could find who the girls were in high school/college that you could have slept with, but didn't, would you want to know? I don't think I'd want to know. Either I'd be pissed off that the list was so short or ...well, I'd probably be pissed off that the list was so short.

I'd rather just go on believing that every chick in high school wanted me.

Leebo33 · Post by **Leebo33** » Fri Apr 01, 2005 5:42 pm

spooky157 wrote:
Leebo33 wrote:If you could find who the girls were in high school/college that you could have slept with, but didn't, would you want to know? I don't think I'd want to know. Either I'd be pissed off that the list was so short or ...well, I'd probably be pissed off that the list was so short.
I'd rather just go on believing that every chick in high school wanted me.

Judging solely by your avatar, I doubt that is the case. They were probably scared of you

sportdan30 · Post by **sportdan30** » Fri Apr 01, 2005 5:43 pm

There are two different "Spooky's" on here, correct? Whenever a Spooky posts, I figure it's the same person.

spooky157 · Post by **spooky157** » Fri Apr 01, 2005 6:44 pm

Leebo33 wrote:
spooky157 wrote:
Leebo33 wrote:If you could find who the girls were in high school/college that you could have slept with, but didn't, would you want to know? I don't think I'd want to know. Either I'd be pissed off that the list was so short or ...well, I'd probably be pissed off that the list was so short.
I'd rather just go on believing that every chick in high school wanted me.
Judging solely by your avatar, I doubt that is the case. They were probably scared of you

I have my fifteen year HS reunion this June so we shall see. Time to work the old spooky charm...

Me: "So ladies, what do you think of the hitting model in MVP?"

Ladies: "Aren't you that guy who sharted in Ms. Mendelson's math class?"

spooky157 · Post by **spooky157** » Fri Apr 01, 2005 6:46 pm

sportdan30 wrote:There are two different "Spooky's" on here, correct? Whenever a Spooky posts, I figure it's the same person.

Spooky is the original. I'm the cubic zirconium.